Music Journalism: Daily Mail Style

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Tom Utley is paid to review a Paul Simon concert, even though he’s only ever been to 2 gigs in his entire life.

Don’t bother to click on the link below – it’s only there should you become overwhelmed with curiosity as to how a man who obviously knows nothing about music and has nearly zero experience of live performances is paid by a national newspaper to review a concert.

Here’s a synopsis of Tom Utley’s pathetic attempt to say anything meaningful about what he experienced at Paul Simon’s farewell tour:

  • I’ve never been to a gig before… actually, I once saw Showaddywaddy live.
  • Tickets for this concert were really expensive (except that I could actually have bought them at a considerably lower cost.. but let’s not put that in the headline).
  • Drinks are also expensive.
  • People who like Paul Simon are all old, fat and pretty unpleasant to look at.
  • They’re also all leftist sheep.
  • Paul Simon wrote a song about the environment.  This makes him a hypocrite because he got here by aeroplane.
  • James Taylor is old and unpleasant to look at.
  • Did I mention that all liberals are unthinking sheep?
  • What a horrible time I’ve had with all these old, ugly leftist sheep.

The ‘concert review’ goes on in this vain for 31 paragraphs, before we get two sentences about the music at the concert (in which Utley admits that Paul Simon is a “genius” but complains that he himself couldn’t sing along to the songs because the arrangements on the night were different to those on the original recordings)…… only to finish off the article with some reference to the audience being liberal lefties.

Well, thanks for the insights, Tom Utley; what’s crystal clear to me, having read the review, is that you have nothing whatsoever to say about music, but use this platform to spew out hatred.  Standard Daily Mail stuff, really.

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